sexuality School Age

Last night, when my husband and I finished making love, we noticed that our six-year-old son was asleep at the foot of our bed. He must have come in while we were making love and fallen asleep. We didn't hear a thing. Was he traumatized? Should we say anything to him? Guest Therapist Elanah Wernik, MSW, answers: A: Your son most probably saw you making love but he obviously felt comfortable enough to fall right back asleep. Most of us have had the experience of waking our children (who have fallen asleep in front of the TV or in our beds) and getting them back to their rooms, speaking with them, giving them a kiss goodnight-- and the next morning the kids don't remember a thing.

Hi, my daughter is 11 years old and very popular. She has developed and started her period. I feel that I'm being over protective. I get nervous when she's alone with a boy. She prefers hanging around with just boys. Sometimes there are three or four around. They are all good kids and very polite and come from good homes, but is there something I need to tell her or be doing? I don't want her to get a reputation. She is a very good girl and we do have open communication. Isn't 11 a little too young to have "BOYFRIENDS?" A It is natural to feel uncomfortable when our children take a big jump that we aren't necessarily ready for. You say that your daughter is 11, but well developed physically and perhaps emotionally.

Exclusive to Wholefamily....Dear Dr. Sylvia, My 11-year-old daughter has hit puberty and all that comes with it. She acts as if she's 20 in some areas of her life and in others, she acts like a five-year-old. How do I let her know that the way she wants to act is not appropriate for her age, and the way she should act is not like a five- or 20-year-old? A At least from your description, your daughter is acting very normal for an early adolescent. The babyish behavior is telling you that she's not sure she's ready to grow up. She still requires the assurance that you're there for her. If the behavior is too childish, like temper tantrums when she doesn't get her way, you can ignore it and discuss the issue at a calmer time.