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Thursday, 14 September 2000

The Affair She Did It, She Didn't

Written by  Toby Klein Greenwald , Michael Tobin

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By Toby Klein Greenwald and Dr. Michael Tobin


Carmen's Dilemma - One Woman's Struggle with Love, Passion and Marriage and the Two Choices She Makes

When Carmen married Dan she wasn't planning on having an affair. Her goal was to create a deeply satisfying marriage with a partner who was her friend and lover.

But something went wrong. Nothing serious at first - it rarely is - just the usual problems: work, kids, money conflicts, a promise made and a promise forgotten - the kinds of small hurts that you dismiss a dozen times until that last one pushes you into a place of bitterness and despair where you have no more explanations or forgiveness left.

That's where we find Carmen and that's why she is so ready for an affair. The affair with Eric offers the possibility of a deep emotional connection and passion.

As she stands at the threshold of his hotel room, she is torn between the desire to fulfill herself as an alive, attractive and sensuous woman on the one hand and the commitment to preserve her marriage on the other.

The Affair is composed of two parallel stories. In each story Carmen makes a different decision. Both stories deal with the attraction, consequences and solutions to marital infidelity and the marital crises that precede it.

Together we enter into Carmen's inner world and through her parallel stories we begin to understand the challenges and crises that most serious relationships eventually face.

Among the questions that the two stories deal with are:

What are the factors that can lead to an affair?

Can a couple work through the effects of an affair, and if so, how?

What is true marital love?

Last modified on Saturday, 21 January 2012 07:37
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Toby Klein Greenwald

Toby Klein Greenwald

Toby Klein Greenwald, Executive V.P. Creative Development, is a founding partner and the editor-in-chief of WholeFamily. Toby is an educator, journalist, photographer, scriptwriter, poet, playwright, lyricist, and theater director, including for populations that have experienced trauma or are at risk. She is a Playback Theater conductor and is the recipient of Israel's Ministry of Education's Egerest Award for Culture, for her work in educational and community theater. She has more than 30 years of teaching experience and has served on numerous educational think tanks. Her specialties include the creation of innovative educational programs, and teaching Creative Writing and Film to AD(H)D and LD high school students, and to senior citizens. Toby is married to Yaakov and they have six children, most of whom have made her a proud mother-in-law and grandmother.

Michael Tobin

Michael Tobin

Dr. Michael Tobin has been a psychologist since 1974, specializing in marital and family therapy. He is the author of numerous articles on marriage and family relationships and is the founder of WholeFamily.com. He's  been married to Deborah for 38 years and is the father of four children and grandfather to five.

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