Is there such a thing as keeping the magic in marriage?
When you fall in love, the magic is there, inside you, around you, between you and your beloved, and it feels wonderful. You forget all your petty problems, you glow, you are transformed into a being of beauty, passion, desire, compassion, and happiness. You become interesting and interested, giving and receiving. You feel united with the whole world, surrounded by magical love.
Falling in love is like a wonderful illness. It has to do with the divine, with madness, with mystery. Anything is possible; the sky has no limits.
But the truth is, marriage can be an opportunity for discovery. And it is precisely when we feel that we have stopped being in love that we encounter our real capacity of LOVING;
And then comes marriage. Living together as husband and wife, raising kids, paying bills and cleaning, laundry. You "fall into" the marriage and the accompanying problems. And you wonder: Why do you have to work so hard i to make the marriage work? How can you keep the magic alive?
The character in the following drama is faced with the same questions. She wonders if familiarity brings a kind of dullness. She questions: in order to have a successful marriage, does she have to falsify herself, to sell her soul?
But the truth is, marriage can be an opportunity for discovery. And it is precisely when we feel that we have stopped being in love that we encounter our real capacity of LOVING; this capacity for loving which has been so often hurt, smashed, neglected, and misunderstood, first by our parents, then by others and even by ourselves.
As little children we were acquainted with magic and joy, but this knowledge was buried in order to survive. As adults, returning to this child quality can renew us and keep the magic in our relationship alive: being enthusiastic and curious about everything. The world is new and surprising and special - have a love affair with the world..
The key to magic in our adult life is to connect with this magic quality. This can keep the magic alive in all of our relationships: with ourselves, with our partner, with our children, with the whole world.
We don't have to sell ourselves, we don't have to play games or behave ourselves and "be nice" to our partner -- we just have to share the Magic without fear.
Tapping into that magic is our principal task in marriage.