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Monday, 29 November 2010

How Parents and Teens Can Talk to Each Other Part I: Parent to Teen

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The Wrong Way

Dear Gabriella,
Your father and I never see you any more. You don't seem to want to have anything to do with the family. I'm fed up with you staying out all weekend. As long as you live here, young lady, you will abide by our rules.

You will be dressed decently and ready to go to your Grandma's by 5:00 Sunday afternoon. I mean it!

Mom

The Write Way

Dear Gabriella,

I know that you're growing up and have your own circle of friends, but I would also like to spend some time with you and have you join us in things that we do as a family.

What can you suggest?

I know that you usually like to go out with your friends on Friday and Saturday nights, maybe one of those evenings you'd like to be here? We could send out for pizzas and rent some videos.

I'm not saying that your Dad and I will join your group, just that it would just be nice to have you and your friends here.

This Sunday we have plans to go to Grandma's for dinner.

Would you come with us? She enjoys seeing you and you like seeing her, too.

If these suggestions don't work for you, I'd be open to your ideas. Let's talk.

Lots of love,Mom


Go to Part II: Teen to Parent

Use at least several of the following principles when you write your letter:
Don't be heavy handed in your tone.Acknowledge that your teenager is no longer a child.Invite her participation in a dialogue.Suggest a solution; frame it as a request.Address each other respectfully.
Last modified on Monday, 29 November 2010 02:21
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