Tamra Dawn is a pseudonym.
Tomorrow, my husband and I will be married 16 years. "An accomplishment!" my 16-year-old says and I'm inclined to agree
Last week, I ran into one of my teenage nieces at a trance party. I was just there out of curiosity -- really. "You are the coolest aunt, " she told me. She has a point. I've lived on a commune, hitchhiked across Europe, marched in demonstrations, have an open mind and love to experience new things. It was that love of new things that led me to my first experience with pot, back in the '60's. I was 18 and in my first year of college. My friend, Bill, and I went to his apartment to pick up the rest of our crowd, and a bunch of people were sitting around the table smoking a joint.
If you're worried about a teenaged son or daughter who doesn't seem to fit in....take heart - and read on: What I didn't know at the time was that if you think there's something wrong with you, others will too. When I was already a mom with kids of my own, I re-met Anne, a girl who had been in my fifth grade class and every class after that but who had been so quiet that I barely knew she existed. She came over for dinner one night with her kids and my husband asked her how she had liked the kids at the schools we had gone to. Her answer was simple-- but to me it was stunning. "I didn't have anything in common with them," she said.
It's become a cliche by now that men stop talking once they get married. My husband, Dan, is no exception. Like everyone, I remember those late, sometimes all-night talks. What started out as loose and free-flowing has turned into something more akin to constipation. It's the surface that bores me. And after 15 years of marriage, a lot of what Dan and I have is surface. Will you put in a load of laundry? Do you have time to take the dog to the vet? "How was your trip?" "Fine." "What did you do?" "Oh, the usual.
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