I am a divorced woman who recently married a divorced man with two small sons. His wife ran off and he got custody of the kids. They're only three and five and they are calling me mommy and seem to be adjusting well.
My own daughter, Becky, is 15. I was single for five years and she and I are used to being very relaxed together. I never had to give her a curfew because she always got in at a reasonable hour. We used to eat pizza for dinner a couple of times a week. Her friends would often hang out and we would watch videos together.
Now my husband is being really strict with her. He wants her in at 11 on the weekends, which I think is too early. He won't allow her friends to come over after 8:00 on school nights. And he doesn't consider pizza a real dinner. He wants dinner at 6:00 every night-with a protein, a starch and a vegetable.
I don't mind making dinner but I feel that he's being too harsh with Becky. When I talk to him about this, he says that she needs a father in her life and she needs limits; he wants her home so we can be a family together.
Now they have started arguing with each other, with Becky storming out of the house. How can I calm things down here? Yesterday he told her that she's not allowed to wear eye makeup anymore.
Becky says that I'm choosing Bob over her, that she hates him and she wants to live at her friend Monica's.
I love Bob, but I don't want Becky to leave. What can I do?